Happiness unlimited

At times, during moments of reflection, I recall the days spent with my parents during school and college years and the times I visited Coimbatore with my wife Geetha. Appa and Amma lived in Coimbatore town, in a locality called Saibaba, a colony near the hills of the famous Marudhamalai. There they had lived 30 years and therefore the house and people who have lived there remain in my thoughts each time I take this journey.

They lived a life of care and concern, love and companionship, with a spirit of give and take and supportive friendship. Each had a well structured daily routine which did not encroach upon the time and space of the other. In general there was overall peace and contentment as their wants and needs were limited and they were happy with what they had. This was a prime reason for their peaceful days.

One of their key activities in a routine day would be to discuss recent issues, topics or news that had come from their children or grand-children (which numbered twenty plus!). The welfare of the family was always in their minds and how they could give possible support and help for the needy. A letter, a phone call, or a message from any one of us became the day’s topic for them. An announcement of a visit from any one of the members of the family became a message of joy, and preparation and plans would begin immediately. My mother was a well organised person and had even earned the nickname “Manager” (from my brother Das) which gives credit to her status as a person expert in managing many portfolios.

My memories go back to my school days at Ambalavayal in Wyanad, Kerala. I had managed fairly above average grades and had even won special prizes for outstanding performances. These awards were given during school functions and my parents would always be there to cheer and appreciate me. Appa, being a chief physician of our hospital, was a well known and popular personality and therefore his son winning prizes was special to many! Such days were very special for them and I enjoyed seeing their pride and happiness as they talked about me to their friends and well wishers, as if their son had won a very great prize. My enjoyment at seeing their happiness laid the foundation for other achievements in my college days. Many ranks, first marks, distinctions and medals came to me out of their encouragement, cheer and joy. But behind all this were sacrifices they had made and the extraordinary support they had given; examples of which are too numerous to list. I was duty bound to pay them back with achievements to bring cheer and happiness to their faces.

It was my habit to bring home a basket of hill vegetables from Ooty, where I served as an agricultural officer in the State Department of Agriculture following my graduation. I knew both of them liked good vegetables and Amma enjoyed the job of sorting and storing them in an orderly fashion. Amma’s close friends also received a share. Appa would say that half the Ooty vegetable market had come home! It saved them the trouble of going to market for two weeks and this gave me lot of satisfaction. Amma would cook her special dishes for me during such trips. Simple, small acts can bring in very satisfying results to all concerned.

During our holiday trips to Coimbatore, we used to stop over on the way at Annapoorna Hotel to buy my parents’ favourite breakfast dishes. Appa liked rice, thair vada and karapoondhi and Amma enjoyed masala dosai, poori and vegetable rice. It saved them time in the kitchen and all of us used to enjoy the breakfast whilst catching up with news. Our next session would invariably be the gift session of the special items which we gave to them with joy. We enjoyed the radiance in their faces and appa would say I must have spent a fortune! However, what we gave was nothing to compared to what we had received from them.

Another aspect which I remember still, was my practice to send a money order to Appa every month and also during special occasions like festivals and birthdays. I knew this money would be very useful for them, but what gave me more joy was to hear Amma describing the scene when the postman came home to deliver the money order. As per Appa’s practice, he would receive the postman well, carefully check the money order, taking his time to sign the receipt and count the cash, and would then offer a tip to the post man with happiness. Amma would have to wait patiently all the time for the completion of this ritual! They would immediately write thanking me and would include all the news from home. Such acts of gratitude go a long way to help and guide us in our daily lives. Behind us and the things we do are our parents good wishes and whole hearted blessings.

My wife, Geetha, planned with me to buy the useful small items which would make their days better. So we started saving for months ahead before our trips home. We enjoyed buying these items from local supermarkets during our trips, much to the delight of our parents. Money does bring happiness sometimes when used wisely.

The time to say farewell was always hard, but the joy continued till the last hours prior to our departure. Amma would make food for the train journey, all my favourite items: coconut rice with a side dish of fried vadams, idli with podi, curd rice and home made pickle. Foods cooked with love and care will always turn out well.

Lasting happiness comes from simple acts of love and care. The value of these get enhanced when you give them to your near and dear ones, particularly your parents. Remembering this and praying to them will greatly help us in our lives, for they will continue to bless us all the time, either with us now, or in heaven. So why not make the most of it as early as possible? Opportunities of this kind do not come twice.

Tags: happiness